Reviewer: Maggot
Review:
What do you get when you cross gross/vomit metal band Anal Blast, the tampon throwing stage antics and vagina callings of Low Twelve, mix in a few strippers on meth, krusty panties, bloody tampon tea bags, a few hits of XTC, a mound of blow and a lot of fun? DICK DELICIOUS and the TASTY TESTICLES, you uneducated fuck. It is obvious you do not go to a lot of metal concerts and festivals where you would have seen all the mayhem of Dick Delicious. It is obvious that you are not in the vast majority of party all night, work all day, freaks that heard the continuous cries of joy on The Howard Stern Show from the mighty king-of-all media, Howard Stern. Yes, even Howard in his quest for the wettest panties on earth and whatnot has made time and even created an award for Dick Delicious. They received the prestigiuos Howard Stern Award for being the inventive, creative, and (oh, yes) even original band of freaks that the are. One of the hits that the played on the H.S.S was a complicated ensamble done in the finest of tastes named, "Diarrhea." In times of oppression, hate and bullshit, rise above and wave your coke straw in the air and ask for more Dick Delicious and the Tasty Testicles. You may act like your so offended when you listen to their music around your friends and thats ok. We'll let you in on a little secret......we've heard the P.M.R.C throw secret parties and even masturbate to Dick Delicious. I accept no responsibility in that rumor but you all know the truth in your speeded out little hearts. The fine collection of Dick Delicious should be a mandatory item that chilren are given when they turn ten. What a fine lesson in life to be learned here. If i would've had the educative process of Dick Delicious involved in my childhood i may have turned out better. Sad admittance, i was one of those sad kids that pulled the chicken to the lovely ladies on Mr. Rogers. I hang my head in shame and beg for the mercy of the mighty Dick Delicious and hope that one day.......yes, one day i'll be able to remove this salad cruet off my dick.
Dick Delicious and the Tasty Testicles are very welled trained in punk, metal, porn, and drugs. You may check out their fine release such as "Bigger Than Ron Jeremy", their self titled album or "We Sold Our Souls For Wet Sloppy Holes." Each album contains party anthems that you will be singing even when the cd stops playing. Join the vast majority and check out some Dick Delicious. Just as a primer for some of the tracks, we have the ever popular.."Diarrhea", the punk rock fury of "Thick Cheesy Discharge," the classic remake of "Hit Me With Your Wet Twat," the punk/metal pounding of "Mystery Emission" and the oddly sounding kazoo filled "Drugs, Guns, Pornography, And Ski Masks." There you have have it, Dick Deliciuos and The Tasty Testicles. I give the band, their releases (musical and flatulent) highest of props. Two thumbs up in the nearest shitfulled cavity and three thumbs and a large bottle beer, up in the nearest thing that is more moist than your mom! Check out their website at WWW.DICKDELICIOUS.COM. They are touring even here in St. Louis April 13, 2003 at the Hi-Pointe.
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